Non-Traditional Non-Profit Non-Boring Business School

May 8, 2026
by Chancellor Daniel Whittington

Grief and Joy are not opposites. They both come from love.

The instinct I sometimes have is to fight the feeling that joy invalidates grief, or that grief is a wet blanket on joy. But I’ve been reading a lot about grief the last few months, and I keep finding every author talking about it the same way.

 You can only grieve deeply for what you truly loved. Grief is the proof of love. The joy of what’s coming runs alongside it, like two rivers merging into a larger current. 

But what if what you’re grieving feels more like theft than loss? I know too many people right now who are grieving the loss of a storyline, a job, or an expected future. Grieving it because it’s over before they are ready. Grieving it because what they loved about it was killed by people who didn’t truly understand it. That loss feels different. 

You can find joy in a future that you get to build. You can find joy in pursuing your dreams. You can find joy in a new opportunity or a new future. But that doesn’t negate the loss of “what could have been”. It can feel like something was stolen from you. 

My friend Sowder said to me this week, “The time to leave something is the overlap between knowing it’s time to go, but still loving it enough to grieve its loss. If you wait past that moment, bitterness, anger and resentment creep in. If you wait too long, leaving is more full of anger than love.”

Sometimes we feel like we’re alone in these moments right up until we say them out loud. Then we find a whole community of people experiencing their own version of the same thing. And that’s why I chose to write this. 

If you’re also on this side of the veil, I’d like to remind you of two things. 

First, grief and joy can coexist. They’re not in conflict.  They might be hard to carry simultaneously, but they’re proof that your heart is open and you still care. That’s a good thing. 

Second, the new thing you are starting is carrying the story forward. It will be informed by and made better by what you’ve lost. What you’ve lost is always a part of you. It will be a part of this new thing too. Try to hold onto love and keep your heart open. 

And remember to be kind. Especially to yourself. 

Daniel Whittington – Chancellor